=*( i don't know what to do anymore...all i know is that it hurts...i just don't know how my world can turn upside down in a matter of a couple of weeks...i really didn't think this would happen...never in a million years...i guess its my own fault for taking something so dear to me for granted....

i guess im not deserving of a love that i thought would last a lifetime... why was i blessed with this gift and now its taken away in just a matter of weeks...he's right the damage was done before, and i guess i was just too blind to see it...but is it too late to fix it? i don't know anymore...i feel like i would give everything i have to save it, but is it enough? it just kills me to know that even if i give it all i have, it might not be enough...i can't stand it...i just wish all this heartache would be healed...i've never cried so much in my life....i guess that's how it goes when you fear you will lose a part of yourself, a part of your life, a part of your soul,a part of your family, and....when you might lose your heart's joy